I had written this very long, in-depth, thoughtful blog about parenting. I previewed it and saved it for later. I reviewed it and deleted it. It's not that I'm ashamed of my thoughts, or that I changed my mind. I realize that this is MY blog and while there are only a few of you who read it, someone may stumble across it someday and I don't want to offend anyone. I have some fairly strong opinions about childbirth, breastfeeding, parenting styles, food dyes and artificial sweetners, toys, and our choices in those matters. But just like politics and religion, my most important opinion is that I respect the different choices that people make. I have a hard time when I read comments on Facebook that are so isolating to one group of people, or that insinuate someone is a better parent because they breastfeed/bottle feed/cloth diaper/only feed their kids natural foods/use flashcards with their 2 month old/vaccinate/don't vaccinate/expose their child to "necessary evils" in preparation for life (no kidding; I actually saw that). It bothers me less when I read it on a blog for some reason.
The fact of the matter is that I believe just about all of us are doing the best we can with what we have. Instead of trying to tear each other down, let's support one another and learn about our different choices and why it works for our families. Let's keep an open mind and an open heart.
On a side note, if you're reading this, I miss you. I hope you are all doing well and that I hear from you soon.
2 comments:
It can be very hard to express opinions without coming off as judgmental and holier than thou. Surprisingly, a lot of the things I thought I would be super adamant about have turned out not to be such a big deal in the real world of parenting as opposed to the ideal world I had constructed in my head. I have a few absolutes that I refuse to compromise on, but not many. And I think a lot of people would benefit from realizing that their way is not the only way. It may be the only way for THEIR FAMILY but certainly not for all families. And I have to remind myself of that from time to time as well. It’s hard not to pipe up and say “Oh, all you need to do is co-sleep and everything will be fine!” when it’s worked out so well for us, but that would be like someone telling me to let Cash cry it out, which I would NEVER do (that’s one of my absolutes!). When it comes to parenting, which is the hardest and most important job any of us will ever have, everyone wants to do the best thing for their child, so any difference in opinion feels like judgment, even when it’s not intended that way. Which is unfortunate, because we could probably all learn a lot from each other.
Well said! I've learned so much, too, about things I said I would do but didn't, or that I wouldn't do but ended up doing. It's certainly been a lesson (or several) in compromise and humility.
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