Sunday's Thanks- 30 For 30 Project

I am officially working on my 30-For-30 Project that I started for my birthday!  I have my cards, I have my list and am now writing those and sending them out.  I plan to write at least 2 or 3 a week, and will share some of those with you guys here.  This isn't my first note, but the first one I wanted to share with you all.


Dear H.Bomb,
Thank you for being so awesome this weekend.  Thank you for your unsolicited hugs, for telling me "I love you" when I hadn't said it first.  Thank you for sharing jokes and laughter with me; you have such a contagious laugh.  Being a stepmom is hard-- the hardest thing I've ever done.  I am expected to act like your parent, to love you unconditionally, to help you develop good habits that will carry you through, to give of myself.  But then I'm also expected to pull back and remember that I'm not actually your parent and have no real say in important life decisions.  When I'm needed, I'm expected to change my schedule and make plans to take care of you, which I always do.  I know, however, that at the last minute, and for a myriad of reasons, I'm told that I can't take care of you because I'm not your family.  And really, it's those last three words that hurt more than anything.  As far as I'm concerned, you are my family.  You are my husband's son, my son's brother.  You look just like your dad-- the freckles, the smile.  You and your brother have the same twinkle in your eyes, the same laugh, the same intensity that both exhausts and inspires me. 
And so in all of the turmoil that comes with a situation like this, we sometimes have these magical moments that sparkle through everything else.  We have those hugs, those shared smiles, the walks, the snuggles, the dance parties, that reassure me that you do love me as much as I love you.  Thank you for reminding me of that all weekend. 
I more than love you.

Too Many Things

I had written this very long, in-depth, thoughtful blog about parenting.  I previewed it and saved it for later.  I reviewed it and deleted it.  It's not that I'm ashamed of my thoughts, or that I changed my mind.  I realize that this is MY blog and while there are only a few of you who read it, someone may stumble across it someday and I don't want to offend anyone.  I have some fairly strong opinions about childbirth, breastfeeding, parenting styles, food dyes and artificial sweetners, toys, and our choices in those matters.  But just like politics and religion, my most important opinion is that I respect the different choices that people make.  I have a hard time when I read comments on Facebook that are so isolating to one group of people, or that insinuate someone is a better parent because they breastfeed/bottle feed/cloth diaper/only feed their kids natural foods/use flashcards with their 2 month old/vaccinate/don't vaccinate/expose their child to "necessary evils" in preparation for life (no kidding; I actually saw that).  It bothers me less when I read it on a blog for some reason.
The fact of the matter is that I believe just about all of us are doing the best we can with what we have.  Instead of trying to tear each other down, let's support one another and learn about our different choices and why it works for our families.  Let's keep an open mind and an open heart.

On a side note, if you're reading this, I miss you.  I hope you are all doing well and that I hear from you soon.